or said in another way, from which the transformers writers may have taken it:

Frodo: "I wish the Ring had never come to me.
I wish none of this had happened..."

Gandalf: "So do all who live to see such times, but that is not for them to
decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is
given to us. There are other forces at work in this world, Frodo,
besides the will of evil. Bilbo was meant to find the Ring, in
which case you were also meant to have it. And that is an
encouraging thought..."


Cory Aquino was a housewife. True, she was educated, was brilliant and hardworking, but in no way did she have the trappings of a "president." she was not a lawyer, an economist, or a military official, or even an undersecretary. Though she said herself, "you can't really be a neophyte with Ninoy as your husband," she was raw and untested, with the entire malevolent machinery of martial law prepared to destroy her.

but when the hands of fate swung to the crux at which past, present and future are determined, she shook off her reluctance, and her boldness and courage shone for a nation darkened in its own fear.

no, she was not "prepared" in the common sense of the word. but she took on the tumultuous tides. she led an entire nation, sparked the people power revolution, which in turn, set aflame other peaceful revolutions in other parts of the globe.

in the ANC coverage of her death, they played her speech before the 1986 US congress. she held her own against the mighty United States House of Representatives. She spoke of how her predecessor used force against an insurgency of 500, which grew at the end of his term to many thousands. She spoke of how she will reach out with peace, with economic reform and justice, to which, surely, the rebels are also fighting for. She spoke of how, when pushed to the edge of the peace talks table, she would have to use force - reluctantly but surely, to defend the newfound freedom of her people.

She talked of the accomplishments of her people, and how it won its democracy by itself. She talked of the injustice brought about by a foreign debt, the conditions of which grew tighter, and the benefits of which, her people never really enjoyed. "you have spent many lives and much treasure freeing other lands, which reluctantly accept it. here is a people that has freed itself, and all you have to do is to help sustain it."

she quoted lincoln's "with charity towards all and malice toward none," drawing a parallelism of the two country's ideals. after thanking america for the "happiest three years of her life" when she, ninoy and her family where there, in a haven for the oppressed, she then invited the US to make the philippines, now free, a haven for the oppressed, and those who love freedom.

she was in her traditional yellow, and many US congressmen wore yellow ties, and accents on their suits. Everyone applauded several times. It was an ovation at the end.

this scene stuck in my head. more than just because of the bright yellow she was wearing, but because here was a president, who, only three years ago, was fearful like the entire nation, reluctant to fight like many, but shook off all fear and reluctance and chose to fight. here was a president, who, only three years ago, lost her husband and in that loss could have given up all hope altogether, but chose to continue hoping instead. here was a president, who, did not have the "preparations" and regular trappings of a ruler, but in the end, her spirit and fight, were what carried her through. and here she was before the mighty US congress, boldly proclaiming the new freedom of her people.

She rebuilt the nation, brick by brick. True, her governance was marred by coup d'etats led by idiots who could not grasp the concept of a people already crying out for democracy. There were also numerous brownouts. A foreign debt had to be paid. A new constitution had to be written. Many of the cronies had to be dealt with. And we can say all the negative things about her presidency.

But she fought on. for all of us.

And everytime our democratic systems seemed to fail us, every time we were confused, we looked to Cory for guidance. Every time our idiocy or our penchant for forgetting our freedom caused us to stumble, we would look to her and what she did. Every time evil came in the form of an envelope those in power did not want opened, or in the form of an ambiguous public apology, or in tapes that had the voice of a president wanting lives in exchange for votes, we looked to her.

every time we thought of our democracy, we thought of her.

every time we thought about the best of us, we thought of her.

contrast that now, to a time when there are those who have been "prepared" in every way, who have all the trappings of a "president" - but all they really have are the outer hulls. they are but lifeless exoskeletons, animated merely by their greed and lust for power. contrast that to a woman, who did not seem to have it on her outside, but was filled with the dreams of the filipino inside, who was animated by how she fought for her people.

as we pray for her family, let's also pray for ourselves and our entire nation. that her death will not go peacefully into the night. that her death, as her life did, spark more changes in millions of people.

that as she did, as she rose to meet the challenge of her time with all boldness and courage, as she kept choosing to hope in the good in the Filipino, we may rise to meet the tides of time head on, and live up to the hope our heroes had and have in us.


...........................
and to everyone running for president in 2010: *&$!#$ &!^%@&* ! mahiya naman kayo kay cory.

ang pagsusulat ay para rin palang pagmamaneho sa metro manila
mag-ingat na sundin ang tuntunin ng mga buwaya; nakamamatay kung hindi
pero dapat marunong kang sumuway at tumakas nang magiting
kung hindi mo kayang kabahan, di ka maka-oovertake;
kung takot kang magalusan ang pintura, umuwi ka na lang.

dahil kung hindi, maiipit ka lang sa EDSA ng isipan - naiihi sa Guadalupe, pero di mo maiwan ang sasakyan.
at kung tutuusing tunay,
yun ang nakamamatay.

WATCH IT. you don't have to be a trekker to enjoy it! :)

Right before they created The Next Generation, Leonard Nimoy cautioned that the difficulty of recreating Star Trek is that it is as if you are catching lightning in a bottle. Well, TNG got off space dock, and soared straight into warp 10.

it looks as if this new new generation is set to also run from impulse power and warp speed into an entirely new generation of fans.

there is also what is known among trekkers, as the "even-numbered movie curse." all odd-numbered movies are more forgettable than their even-numbered counterparts. google them, and the star trek movie you remember most must be an even-numbered one.

that's another red alert on this one. it rolls out on an even numbered space dock. but it looks like it broke the curse.

first, the casting is phenomenal. awesome work here. they looked like the actors and actresses. it's as if you were really looking at the Starfleet Academy Yearbook. awesome work too, on researching and enacting the nuances of each character. and good job on the lines that jolt you back to the other movies. perfect example is bones mccoy: amazing! major major props.

the production design is also interesting. i like how it is consistent with much of the star trek prod design bible, and how it looks like it will evolve into the future patterns, costumes and technology.

the effects. this i have to say quite a mouthful about. as a viewer, i enjoyed the fast-paced action and how the effects helped the pacing and the explosive visual treatment (even the new angles of shooting the enterprise helped. if before, the best you got was the beauty pass of the galaxy class, here you get the twists and turns that really happen on collision and attacks). yet, some of the effects looked TOO MUCH LIKE STAR WARS.

migo tells me that Lucasfilm did the effects. WHAT THE TRIBBLES! the warp speed looked too much like hyper space - AND DON'T YOU DARE SAY THEY ARE THE SAME. once and for all, in hyper space, the ship moves in light speed throughout space, in warp speed, SPACE MOVES. listen to scottie's lines in the movie, and it makes sense. actually, his lines that explained warp speed a bit helped allay my uneasiness about the hyper space look alike.

the laser cannons also looked too much like han solo's cannons firing off the millenium falcon, or vader's Tie Fighter blasts. PLEASE. there is a huge difference between phaser banks and laser cannons. phaser banks are classier and more elegant.

but i forgave them. my nerdy-trekker side gave way to the fact that it is still an amazing, enjoyable star romp throughout time and space.

and also because of the story.

whatever trekkers (even my dark trekker half) may say about some inconsistencies - iowa is not the enterprise's birthplace, chekhov arrives a few years later, etc. - the story in its essence is still very much star trek : a future of hope, a future where we finally fix our idiosyncrasies and work together for a cause bigger than ourselves.

and besides, if the trekkers still try to make a big issue out of the small detail changes, (SPOILER WARNING) the time-space-continuum-alternate universe phenomenon explains it. and no, i don't think it's a cop-out. in fact, i think it was well-woven into the story (i am reminded of the DC and marvel universes at this point, where i don't know how well-woven those alternate universe storylines are), and as migo put it: what other story will time-alternate-universe-phenomena work best but in the story that started it all?

moreover, everytime Leonard Nimoy is part of the story creation, he makes sure that the story is sound. well, it certainly continues to work here.

now, the theme.

while the movie is definitely loveable and enjoyable, it lacked a certain sense of gravitas that the best star trek films had. some of the best trek films had literary archs - Moby Dick for First Contact, Hamlet and Ceasar for Undiscovered Country - or a striking message for the times - to protect the environment in The Voyage Home, and the collapse of an entire race and how a people was to embrace their former enemy in Undiscovered Country. This one - well... okay. sure, Vulcan was sucked into a black hole - or became the black hole itself, rather.

yet, i am weighing if that comment of a lack of depth to the movie is fair. after all, if the objective was to reintroduce Trek to a new generation, and to prove that it is still a Trek worth taking, then it had done its job. maybe it is a challenge to its second and third movie? maybe it can step it up there?

i hope so, because i fell for Star Trek not just because of the sci-fi stuff, but because while it expanded the limits of space outward, it also probed one's humanity. and one of the reasons star trek has become a classic is because of its questions it asks of us.

another question with regards to the future is how does this movie pit against the other Star Trek movies? That is one i still have to ponder on. how does it rank?

For me, my all-time star trek movie is still The Undiscovered Country.

for now, amazing job of resurrecting the franchise, of talking to two generations of high and scrutinizing expectations: first, the hardcore fans who will watch out for every detail, and the second, those who raise an eyebrow at the first group, who ask "what the hell is star trek? what drives these trekkies crazy? can i enjoy it?"

It was a delight, a hair-raising, eye-glossying ride. For this fanboy who grew up on this, it's like meeting my old friends, and finding out even more about them, and even mind-melding with them.

lightning in a bottle? there seems to be an abundance in whatever bottle they put it in.

burping is an amazing gift.

to appreciate this gift from God,

imagine vomiting the whole day, with intestinal tremors and trauma.

burping is an awesome creation.

kung tutuusin, lahat ng nota, available sa lahat ng musikero.

at lahat ng salita, available sa lahat ng manunulat.

kung gayon, ang classic, ang magaling, ang magtatagal, ay yaong makagagamit talaga ng kung ano ang naroon na.

iba ang bagsak ng mga salita ni stephen king sa bagsak ng essays ng isang typical college freshman. iba ang bagsak ng nota ni mozart sa bagsak ng nota ng isang aspiring angsty musician.

siguro totoo nga ang sinasabi nila, na genius, is really creating new possibilities from what is already there.

nakita ko na naman ang mahiwagang butas sa aming townhomes.

mahiwaga ito dahil hindi ko pa rin batid ang katotohanan tungkol sa kaniya hanggang ngayon.

mga 13 years na kami rito sa Regency Park Townhomes sa Santolan, at ilan sa inyo eh naibaba na ako rito o sa tabi-tabi, at iilan sa inyong bumabasa nito eh kapit bahay ko pa ano? baka nga.

pero sa tanan ng aming pananatili rito, eh hindi ko pa rin mabatid ang katotohanan sa mahiwagang butas sa harap ng unit 312.

ang unit 312 eh nasa isang pababang slope ng lupa. sa tapat nito eh ang garahe (duh) at ang isang palm tree at ilang shrubs of God-knows-which-tree-from Eden.

at nandon, sa konkreto, malapit sa mga puno-puno, ay isang butas.

mahiwaga ito dahil 10 years ago, lumabas daw dito ang isang groundhog.

yes, friends, the famed groundhog that comes out on groundhog's day.

what the shit?! same here.

naglalaro kami nina kitt, joseph, kapatid kong si yoyo at ako ng mga habulan o water balloon wars, o parang naglalakbay lang yata kami in between houses. para bang naghahanap kami ng Super Nintendong magpapagana nung balang gusto naming laruin. (shows my age, shows my age. SNES, tsongs. SNES!)

at nang nadaan kami sa tapat ng unit 312,si joseph, ang lokong si joseph, (feeling ko si joseph kasi siya ang pinaka-nerd), bigla ba namang sinabing "GROUNDHOG!"

at nagulat kami't nagsitakbo sa kung nasaan siya nakaturo.

10 years ago, magulo pa ang shrub and other plantlife sa areang yun. kaya malay ba namin, di ba. four tweens looking for summer adventure can be more "high" than teens on drugs. and so we were looking for, yes, a groundhog, in the middle of a tropical summer.

but wala naman kaming nakita. so joseph kept saying, "nandito siya. nandito siya."

anak ng tokwa, wala nga eh, di ba jo?

well, nakalimutan din namin siya after some games of Mortal Kombat (again, my age!), Nba Live 95 (my age!!!!), Super Mario World, at Rockman X. and many many many more years.

actually, hindi na kami masyadong nagkakakita-kita ngayon. ang kapatid kong si yoyo na lang siyempre ang regular kong nakikita di ba? naman, friends.

pero pati si yoyo gusto kong tanungin, naaalala mo ba yung groundhog?

at well, kung hindi man groundhog yun, it must have been a really really really big-ass rat.

and if it were, then could it have been a mutated rat? then could it be that deep down below that hole is an entire mutated society where, in fact, four other turtles mutated with that rat? Holy Cowabunga!

Fine. Kung hindi man yun, eh di bakit may butas dun noon, at bakit hanggang ngayon, eh hindi pa matakpan-takpan ang butas na yun? Are we waiting yet again for the return of a mystical creature?

I laugh everytime i pass by unit 312, that place, and when i remember that day. "The Groundhog Day." ha. anak ng tipaklong. ay, groundhog pala.

kung totoo sanang groundhog yun, eh di nadiskubre naming magkakaibigan ang unang groundhog sa pinas!

one of those fly-by-night illnesses,

a sudden fever to remind you of your mortality.

to remind you that people care for you, that the people you love love you too, immensely. more immensely than you think, and more immensely than they often show.

a reminder that you matter to God. and thus, you should matter to yourself.

mag-exercise, huwag mag-isip ng trabaho sa bahay - trabaho lang 'yan. babagsak din ang ekonomiya isang araw. magmahal - yun ang mahalaga. hindi ka makina - kahit kompyuter nga, nag-uupgrade, nagde-defrag. magpahinga ka. magsaya ka. magpaka-blanko ka ng isip paminsan-minsan. mag-toothbrush ka. yung matagal, di gaya ng pagmamadaling pag-brush sa umaga. mag-deodorant ka. kalkalin mo ang kabinet mo para sa mga matagal mo nang di nasusuot at mangako kang masusuot mong muli ang mga di na kasya sa yo.

kung puno ka ng galit, pagkamuhi o pagsisisi, aminin mo muna sa sarili mo habang nakaratay ka sa kama. kanino ka ba talaga galit, bakit ka napagod, at itaas mo sa Maykapal lahat ng ito dahil hindi mo naman talaga kaya na mamuhay lahat ng ito sa puso mo.

enjoy-in mo ang sunset. cheesy. enjoy-in mo ang amoy ng dalampasigan. hmmm... dito, may kanal, but the scent is close enough. just don't get too close, dahil mangangamoy basura na.

magpasalamat kang may gamot ka, may bahay ka, may village kayong may magandang view ng sunset.

magpasalamat kang may mga nagmamahal sa yo.

pasalamat ka, na kaya mong magmahal.

magkasakit ka paminsan-minsan. biglang liliwanag ang lahat.

"Let it be told to the future world that in the depth of winter, when nothing but hope and virtue could survive, that the city and the country, alarmed at one common danger, came forth to meet it."

haunting.

i tried reading something else right after it, just because i felt like i was in the reading groove, but Stephen King's The Green Mile just... well.. haunts you even after you read it. not in the ghost-white lady-kapre-balete drive-Magandang Gabi Bayan on November 1 - sort of haunting. it gnaws on you, it makes you think, and it makes you remember its most poignant moments.

it's my first Stephen King novel. i'm more of a John Grisham type (nerd). John Grisham has always made me think about Life (wise asses, i don't mean "life" in general), - i mean human life - the right to exist vis a vis the committing of a crime, the so-called "justice" of a death sentence, the "humane" ways of execution, and even everyday gore and glory in the little choices we make. Yet, Stephen King discusses some themes in ways both more graphic and haunting. While Grisham chooses verisimilitude so that the very grit of life leaps through the text and makes it believable, King weaves in a fantastic element. And what's scary about it is that it's a fantasy you can believe.

i've hesitated to buy my first King novel, because of his reputation as a horror-thriller writer. I get too imaginative sometimes and scare myself with images from the last book i read or movie i saw (i remember the Feng Shui scare). but i was told that his scariness is more on the psychological level. then i caught a part of The Green Mile on HBO or Star World - just a piece really, just the part where Coffey restores Mrs. Moores, until the end of that chapter (no spoilers here). i didn't get to start or end it. i was captivated and thus decided that this would be my first King novel.

his fantastic elements are still grounded on reality. it's all so convincing you can even hear your disbelief being suspended into submission. the way his characters speak, and even the way he writes - you'd expect to see,call or write the characters and ask them how they are (those still living in the end, at least).

and because he expresses his themes and questions so graphically, you'd be replaying the scenes in your head again and again. Paul Edgecombe told me (feeling close) that the scenes from Cold Mountain penitentiary would replay in his head, and that the had to write to be able to process it. well, i see where he's coming from.

Based on the Green Mile alone, Stephen King is indeed a horror master. not because he gives me goosebumps or uses cheap tricks like monsters and spirits in the dark. but because he makes us look into ourselves and ask the scariest of questions, and find something truly haunting: that often, we don't have the answer.

embered leaves
like rain of fire
falling on souls
remembering old flames

or the gentle taps
of drops
on windows
like fingers
looking for warmth

dragons
tired of anarchy
looking toward oases
looking to drown
in ocean after ocean after ocean

steam on cool windows
of heated bedrooms
broken rims of eyeglasses
left alone near yellowing photographs
inside cracked picture frames

sniffing
and wailing
in dark corners of stairs
waiting for angels to descend

how many miles of memories
how many twists and turns of truth
shall we walk again

when the treasure trove of tunes and overtones
opens her mouth

and sings anew?